mao dun.
8:27 a.m. - 23.09.2005

yay! prelims over.:)

ha. i feel super relaxed. :) it's weird how i feel rather..or a little excited to start on my a levels preparation ..:) so weird. maybe it's cos i have something to work to. i keep telling myself..in about 2 months time....you'll be free. really free.:) and, i would like to indulge in some arty farty stuff then.:D haaa...lots of ideas.:) surely have much more time compared to after Os. :) haa...

funny. couldn't really sleep well for prelims time period. i didn't really face this problem last time. i jsut used that breathing technique way....concentrate on breathing..thencan go to sleep..read from some meditation webbie.:) somehow it doesn't help now. i've got to learn to sleep. hm.

and, i get weird dreams. i dreamt that my mum saw my diary. and i grabbed it from her. :s ha...then, i dreamt of council gatherings!! haa..2 times.once was in somekind of obs place.:P and i passed wenqing some keys for the place..cos i had to go somewhere..fangyi was busy trying to get people to take photo...then, she realised that never bring camera..then, i said.."rosie has!"..then, she said,"but must pay $3...!" haa..dreamt that i had to go check one of those game stations...it was some tunnel-like thingy....like the halloween path under the audi area.:) haa.:) the other gathering was in sch. ha. i somehow laid on a class bench and slept. we had been playing something before that. but i couldn't remember.

ha. then, last night, as i rested my brain. i dreamt of mini, ade..and actually got some other people..sawah wasn't there..then i asked what happened? but no one knew...hm. :(

weird dreams.

haa..dreamt of the superstar people...silver, ruth, sugianto. weird combi. they were practising some song. ha....:D

ha.:)i get more dreams during the prelims period.:) why ah? is it because i use my brain more then? -_-

hm. i'm not very sure.

i'm considered rather old now. suppose to be mature? or near mature..?haa..how come i don't feel so? somehow i don't feel older? hm...i used to think u had to feel older...as you grew. hm. in sec school, i didn't feel any difference between myself beinbg sec 1 and 2...but then, when you're sec 2 and you look at OTHER sec1s..you feel older..but when you judge yourself from sec 1 to 2....you don't really feel older. okie. maybe i would have developed certain skills..confidence etc ..but i feel just the same.

that whole feeling of growing up can seem rather surreal at times. it's as if i'm just living a dream. when i see how those so-called adults have jobs and all that...that kind of life seems so distant. so far-away. as if i will never reach that stage. now, i'm already nearing 20 years old. going to go to uni soon. haa...and suddenly all that stuf about jobs seems so near. but then, at the same time, i don't feel like i'm ready. yet, at the same time...i can't wait to get a job. i want to experience more and get exposed to more of society.

ha. mao2 dun4.

i'm so mao2 dun4.

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